Re-name the Bagel-ful

While I am sure that Kraft spent a bazillion dollars coming up with the perfect name for this engineered food-type product, I think I can do better.

How about you?

Here is what I came up with:

Bagel-ful-of-goo
Bagel-ful-of-artificial cheese product
Bagel-ful-of-chemicals & preservatives
Bagel-ful-of-impaired insulin sensitivity
Bagel-ful-of-why-is-my-butt-so-big
Bagel-ful-of-my-mom-is-to-lazy-to-even-make-a-real-sandwich

Bagel-ful-of-crap?

13 thoughts on “Re-name the Bagel-ful

  1. The Bagel Goop is a very disturbing product. I totally agree with the name “Bagel-ful-of-my-mom-is-to-lazy-to-even-make-a-real-sandwich”.

    Yes, we live in a fast paced world and we all have time constraints but are we really managing our time well when it comes to the health of our family?

    As a single mother who owns her own business, volunteers at school, is an active member of networking groups and manages a chronic disease, I know all about living a fast paced life and not having a lot of time. I also know how important it is to eat wholesome, healthy food – if you don’t your body suffers. My point is, I make time for the preparation of healthy foods and lunches for my daughter.

    I cringe at the product put out by Smuckers; pre-made frozen peanut butter and jelly sandwiches on overprocessed white bread or what about those Lunchables by Oscar Mayer?

    We send our kids to school on this stuff and expect them to perform. Isn’t there an old adage that goes like this “Garbage In, Garbage Out”?

    North Americans, especially American’s want to stay competitive in the global market when it comes to educating our future. How can we expect to do this when we are filling our future generations with brain defying food-stuff?

    Thank you for spreading awareness!

  2. it’s like a bagel version of a twinkie. I bet they would survive an explosion, come out toasted.
    what is it with smuckers coming out with god-awful things?

  3. Newsflash!

    April 23, 2020

    Kraft introduces New & Improved

    Bagel-fuls stuffed with Soylent Green

    now with 20% more people!!!

    and you think I am kidding

  4. oh good grief. Is that a real product? Suddenly I am very thankful for my husband’s food intolerance that keeps me out of the frozen food aisle. He got a big laugh out of this one.

  5. Most of these negative comments about the bagelfuls are unfounded. Bagelfuls are a fast, convenient, and tasty way to get the enjoyment of a toasted bagel with cream cheese in a matter of seconds. I’ve tried almost all the flavors and every one has its own unique taste. Bagelfuls have almost completely eliminated my consumption of real bagels. I can’t remember how many times I would take a bagel with me on the way to school or work and end up with cream cheese all over my shirt and/or car. Bagelfuls have solved this problem. Bagelfuls have also been a great topic of conversation in my social life. When people see me eating them they always inquire as to what it is. My colleague in one of my classes has made this one of our major subjects of conversation after class. We always discuss any new flavors we may have tried and critique them. Please don’t knock this product until you try it.

  6. Actually, I like them. The only problem I have with them is that it took about 3 times as long as the box said to cook them before they were yummy and gooey. Other than that, I thought they were a great, quick breakfast.

  7. Amen Jonathan…I love these!!! They’re much better for me than the giant office bagels and it’s so convenient. I hope they make a low fat cream cheese version soon, but as they stand..they’re not too bad in fat or calories. I mean…if you’d rather eat a 500 calorie bagel..you could..but why would you when this is just perfect.

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